Thoughts About Earlier Thinking

This topic is perfect for today because it’s my birthday and so I spent awhile thinking about the younger me I guess you could say. I thought about how much I’ve changed and how much a lot has changed and it’s like that Panic! At the Disco song that goes, “Things have changed for me and that’s okay” and well I don’t agree with the next verse that goes “I feel the same” well because I don’t feel the same; I’m not the same person I was when I was little. The way I think and see things now has changed a lot from when I started high school and I’m grateful that I’ve been able to open my eyes to all these new topics that I never gave much thought to before. Philosophy has helped me with this too. I mean I would have probably eventually gotten to thinking about things like the meaning and definition of sanity, society, status, morals, etc. but I’m glad I was given a class period a day to actually really think about it and form my own opinions on them even though I don’t really voice them a lot except to my close friends. One thing that I really started changing my mind on was friendship…like I was starting to really doubt what it was and exactly how to define who my friends really were. I try talking to people and I mean does constant communication really mean friendship? And a great example was today. Like I talk to so many people on a daily basis and I create this illusions I guess of what they mean to me and what label I should give them and it kind of started getting to the point where I jumbled up all these labels and I couldn’t differentiate who was who anymore if that makes any sense. It was kind of scary but more upsetting to me that I couldn’t really define what each person meant to me anymore because I started overanalyzing what everything was. I have to admit that today started out sticky and just not good but at the end of the day I can say I really did enjoy my day. The person that I was starting to doubt more and more everyday showed me that I needed to stop being an over thinker because I can honestly say I’ve had the same best friend for the past 7 years. Seven freaking years. That shows you that while the whole world may be falling down, some things can stay the same. I guess the point I’m trying to get to is that today I finally realized that everything is okay. Things get messy and things will always continue changing cause that’s the whole point of life and progress and time and everything and as long as I know that my family and best friends are there with me then I’ll be okay. This is super long and sorry if you actually took the time to read ALL of this because well to be honest I was finally just letting everything out which I think is what you wanted Mr. McCarthy even though it doesn’t make much sense…but oh well I tried at least.